Claiming:Camp/Alexander Ramirez

Index > Camp Claiming > Camp/Alexander Ramirez

Name: Alexander Ramírez

Years:16

Gender: Male

God Parent: Hecate,Ariadne, Cibele

Mortal Parent: Adam Ramírez

Appearance: See foto

Personality: He is mysterious and usually thinks when walking in the forest. He doesn't trust anyone unless they deserve to. He is very wise and likes all kinds of mental challenges as well as mysteries.

History: 

His father was a mythology teacher in the Columbia University when a new student came. She was very mysterious but also very smart. They quickly fall in love and one night she came to his house for help but when he was going to eplain the subject he innstantly woke up in the bed alone. He never saw she again while no one remembered her except him. Three months later he received a letter along whith a little boy.

1 year later, his father married a woman named Anastasia. The three of them moved to Florida and had a very peaceful life near the coast unaware that monsters where watching them. He didn't have a very interesting childhood because they didn't have a lot of money to spend. He went to a school near his house but hedidn't get along with the other kids. He use to believe that powerful beings wher watching him. And they did.

In his fourteenth birthday ,an empusai disguised as another student that was in the school for a year, attacked him because she had noticed that a demigod was there, attacked him while in gym. When he thought it was the end another student came and defeated her.

The two of them stayed in his house for over a year but the monsters came: a group of stymphalian birds attacked them, a hellhound nearly eats them and a scythian dracanae almost kill them but when the last one came they managed to kill her and he got his bow and arrows as a spoil of war. Finally they leaved Alexander's home because of the monsters and in less than a month they arrived at Long Island being chased by an amount of monsters but finally entered camp.

Weapons: powers,silver and celestial bronce magical bow and arrows

Signature:Roderik27 (talk) 16:23, December 8, 2014 (UTC)

comments

hi and welcome to camp! I'll be your claimer for today and I've noticed a few problems with your claim that I feel you should fix

• sorry but you need to have three choices for a god parent (but here's a consolation prize your close some just put 1 and be done with it >,<)

• please elaborate a bit bore on the personality? maybe three sentences? You could do more we wont penalize your of course :)

• please elaborate more on how thee parents met and maybe a bit more on his early childhood history?

• he was attending collage when he was 14? is that possible? if I'm wrong please tell me

• monsters dont attack mortals as they cant see them (remember the mist?) they're only interest is in demigod and nothing else so please change that

• monster's would attack would be more frequent after the first attack so please add at least one for every year he didnt go to camp (you can pick a few here but please stick to the easy monsters ok? [1] )

• goddess wont appear suddenly as that would be considered to be direct interference so please change that

• how did he get his weapon?

• please mention the age he reach camp on top of the page ok?

thats all the problems I see so please change it so that someone can claim it :)

sorry for the thing about someone in college at 14 XD

Behind those cold hard computer screens.....There’s a human heart beating away its emotions… 18:16, December 8, 2014 (UTC)

• Wait, the little boy was actually able to fit in a letter?

-> "Nine months later he received a letter whith a little boy inside."

• Having the first monster attack at the age of 14 is late however still acceptable when given the right circumstances so kindly supply the reason why his first monster encounter happened that late.

• Please add more details about his early childhood.

• Mention at least one monster attack each year since his first monster encounter. look at the last paragraph, it has been there before

• Where did he get his weapon? look at he last paragraph, it has been there before

• Why did it take two years for them to reach camp? 

Smile and wave, boys. Now that's the worst disguise ever. ~Alias Kit

What's so special about the stepmother that prevented monsters from attacking Alexander for all those years? His stepmother is mortals and monsters do not attack mortals so if the stepmother is near him all time the monsters do not attack.

"No wind is of service to him that is bound for nowhere."  -Wind   

wind have a point why didnt the monster's attack when the mom was there? is she a demigod? but still you could just take that part out cause monster dont sense demigods until their powers develop (usually 12 but for big three its earlier thats why they get attack sooner) soo please change that

Behind those cold hard computer screens.....There’s a human heart beating away its emotions… 15:55, December 11, 2014 (UTC)

Hai, I read through your claim since I saw you edited it, and I have some things that could use some tweaking, also just some questions too o.o

• Godesses usually give birth at about 3 months, due to being goddesses and not mortal :3
• How did his father die in a fire? What caused it?
• Where did this "demigodess" come from? How did he/she know he was being attacked?
• Four years is a VERY long time for two random kids to be traveling around, without a place to stay, and no food. A year alone is pushing it, I would recommended that you keep his father alive until he is 16, and then have them leave to camp then, if you want your character to be 16
• Lastly, this is completely optional, but a fencing sword isn't too practical a weapon in actual combat situations, as it is only used for piercing and jabbing, but again, completely optional :p

"Lord of the Hidden Realm"-"Gateway between Realms"~HiddenRealm