Shattered Memories

by: Caesey Ongsee, Son of Mnemosyne

Glass breaking

At the dawn of this new year,

There is one thing I still fear:

Will this time of my life worthy of a cheer,

Or a time where my soul is still not clear?

My life was never near sweet,

I was always put under other's feet,

My life was forced to enjoy no heat,

Nor to cherish the tunes of those upbeat.

My sole family put me through damnation,

Put me through negation,

Put me through no salvation,

Even put me through exploitation.

My friend was no freedom,

Nor my ally was my own kingdom.

I have no happy home nor everyday was my saintdom,

Just my little world, punished by whoredom.

Hearing my story may want you to crack a laugh,

Compose a putrid song on a putrid staff,

Or even make a movie on my behalf.

But let me swear to your little life graph,

That you didn't even felt what I felt, not even to a stupid half.

However, however, with all my heart,

That hope will be my year's start.

I'll never look back nor let myself be a weak part.

To this small world, I impart:

I'll look forward for a better life,

More on joy, less on strife.

This year, I'll never be the lowlife,

And take happiness as my wife.

To those who didn't give a damn about me,

To those who never set me free,

I tell you that I will never flee,

I will never look in this world just as to see,

An endless black field: my life as a sea.

Yeah, my life was nothing but a curse.

Everything bad was my firsts.

But let me swear before your false judgment can immerse,

I am a person of its own verse,

For best or worst its for me to rehearse.

  • Notes: When Caesey was brought to America under the "supervision" of his uncle, he experienced nothing but misery. He got abused mostly on physically, but little did his uncle know he was killing his mental sphere. Eventually, after successive unruly and obscene attempts, Caesey was almost brought to mental damage. Yes, he was still sane and a person like everyone else, but those events in his life moved him to the "less normal" side. He wants to change despite having self-difficulties. He wants something better, even though no one sees this processing resolve in him.
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