||Best friends are people you don't need to talk to every single day. you don't need to talk to each other for weeks, but when you do, it's as if you'd never stopped talking.
(Fun Fact: I wrote all of this before you'd even given me my birthday template so <3 I'm also not going to change any of it and keep it how it is)
Since the last time I gave you one of these, so much as happened. I left, came back, we fought multiple times but in the end of it all, you still remained a true friend to me. Unlike last year, I'll try and make this less awkward but I’ll start off by saying that you're amazing and whatever flaws you think you have, are among the best qualities of you. The first thing I want to say, is that you make me aspire to be a better person - whether it be personality wise, rp-ing wise or coding wise, a large amount of my aspirations come from you. I like how you’re nice as fuck, funny and in general an amazing person. I know you don’t like it, but I think you being protective is a good thing - it proves you care and I’d rather be friends someone with someone who cared a lot than someone who couldn't give two shits. To be honest, there’s sometimes where I wonder how someone like me, can call someone like you as my best friend (and then it leads me to think how you can think of me as the same position but w/e this is about you not me xD) and tbh, thank-you for being that person and just know nobody could ever replace you c: I'd like to think we've gotten closer since the last year. I mean, loads of things can happened (to name a few: the first depression, me leaving from December through February-ish, the whole fiasco about Chen on DARP and Felicia and all the times I thought it was someone else > me), but I feel like each of them have made us closer and made me realise that undoubtedly you're one of my closest friends I've had.
Do I consider you a brother? No, no I don't. I consider you a twin, as twins are meant to share a special bond far beyond brothers and that's what I compare our friendship to. The quote at the top is one that I think really represents us - even after I left and came back, we talked like I had never left. Although we did have some things that were outcomes of it, in general, nothing changed too much. I know I worry too much about you dropping me, but it’s because you’re the best friend I’ve ever had and I always have that feeling in my mind that I’m not good enough for you and that you’ll find someone better than me and I’ll be a burden. But I know now I’m not and I’m really sorry for having you sit through my endless thoughts on it. To commemorate this, let’s go back over our friendship.
I mean, we started out as strangers - on the HG wiki, I entered one of your games and that's how I recognised your name when you too came to here (you joined 6 days after me js <3333), but now you're the one thing that gives me hope through this relapse. I've already told you but you're the reason I strive to get better mentally, it's because of you that I'm becoming more open with my feelings which in turn is getting better and it's because of you that sometimes when I have really dark thoughts I stop myself. I know I might get annoying when I talk about my feelings with you and constantly worry if I'm being replaced or you hate me, it's just that it's happened to me once before with someone I thought was a true friend and I hated it then. If you did it too, it'd crush me even more because you're one of the truest friends I've ever had.
There's probably so much more I could write here, and you might find some on the other tabs (who knows with me xD) but I just want to know that you mean so much to me, more than I think you could know and I remember one thing you told me last year and I think I connect to it much more now than I did. That thing being that you interfered with my plans with others because you wanted to be a part of everything I do. A year ago, I thought it was stupid and I couldn't have a connection with it. Now? Now I know what you mean and although you might not do it as much anymore/at all, I'm beginning to do it and I know what you mean. The poem below is something I wanted, and something I found in you:
Sometimes when I say,
I want someone to look me,
In the eyes and hug me tight,
"I know you're not."
At the time I found this poem, it was me who I thought needed this person in the poem and for that person to be you. But now this poem has a double meaning - it's new meaning being that I'm telling you I'm going to be that 'someone.'
The aim of this tab is for it to be a place to go whenever you overthink, whenever you're down and you need something to pick you up (though I hope you'll be talking to me <3). Remember this is a tab for you to go whenever you need it, if you want to feel loved or if you want to feel happy - this tab'll be there for you. What is this tab? Well, it's 26 reasons as to why I'm really happy you're my best friend, brother and twin.
- You're kind: I know I say you sometimes do this but honestly, you've never been mean to me outside of an argument. You've always been one of the kindest people I know and I'm honoured that I can experience this every single day because it's one of the best things ever.
- You're caring: You care about your friends, whether they're your best friend or a new friend, you care for them. It's because you care so much that people love you and it's because of it that people want to be around you because they know if they need someone to care for them, you're there.
- You're funny: You're one of the funniest people I know and every single conversation we have you always say something that makes me laugh - I don't think there's been a single day in our friendship that I haven't laughed or been reduced to laughing like some crazy person because of you. Again, I'm glad I can experience this every single day.
- You're imaginative: You come up with some of the best and some of my most favourite ideas ever. Every single idea you've come up with I've loved in some degree (even the Chinjae kid). It's because of your imagination mixed with mine I think that our collabs are always so amazing and why I want to make them really quickly.
- You're loyal: This is perhaps one of the qualities I've come to really love and appreciate in the past year. Through the past year I've put you through some shit, I've said things I don't mean and I know I've made you feel things I couldn't forgive myself for. But through every single thing, you've forgiven me and loved me and been extremely loyal to me and for that, I thank you. Despite what you say, I can never thank you or your loyalty enough but know that the largest amount of gratitude wouldn't even be enough to convey how I feel.
- You're open-minded: Any time I disagree with something you want to do, or want to change it slightly, you listen and don't get mad. You take on opinions well and you can change to make whatever you're doing perfect. To me, that's something everyone should have - it makes you accepting, loving and caring. You might think at times that you're not open-minded, but believe me, you are.
- You're supportive: This is another thing I've gotten to experience and see in the past year and again, I thank you so much for it. Whatever problem I went through or whatever obstacle I faced, you were there beside me supporting me. To me, your support means so much to me and I value it deeply.
- You're a role-model: I know I say I'm jealous of you a lot and I am because I want to be just like you. Whether that's personality wise, coding wise or even character making wise, I want to aspire to be like you because you are one of the most amazing people I've ever met. You make me want to be a better person, to improve my flaws so I can be a better person and friend not only to you, but to everyone.
- You're ambitious: If you want something, you'll strive for it. I already knew it, but the Nationstates' endorsement challenge really showed me that. Whether it's something small or big, you know how to get to it and that's again something I admire.
- You're smart: I can't remember the last time I've said this to you, I know I've said it, and you need to know that I do think you're incredibly intelligent and I bet that science test you were worrying about went extremely well and that whenever you have your finals that you're gonna do amazing in them.
- You're fun to be around: There's not a day that goes past that I'm bored when I'm with you. You brighten and make my day fun in so many ways that I couldn't name just one thing. You're like your Exo-K bias to me; the 'Happy Virus.'
- You're honest: I don't think I've ever met someone who's more honest with me than you are. If you dislike something I say, do or think of, you tell me and I love that more than someone who lies to me. I know with your feelings you're not as honest, but I can see why and that doesn't make me think any less of your honesty.
- You're protective: I know you think this is a bad trait of yours, but trust me, it isn't. I love that you're overly protective of your friends. It shows you love them and that you care for them and that they mean the world to you. I love it personally because I know that because you think of me as yours, I have someone there for me. So stop hating this thing about yourself boo <3
- You're loving: You love people for being there for you, you love them for being your friend and you love them for so many other reasons. You give people you're close to so much love and I know that I'm appreciative of it. You're love means so much to me (as you know, when I feel like you don't believe me or whatever, I get really sad) and again again, I'm thankful I get to experience it.
- You're patient: Especially towards me, you've shown incredible patience throughout this past year and even further whenever I took too long to finish something or I was being difficult with what I said or did.
- You're confident: I don't know if you know this or not, but you're really confident in my eyes. I love how you're so outgoing on chat and I really wish I had the ability to do that.
- You're selfless: This point was really shown to me in the past few weeks when you didn't come on for a few days and you said that you hid your feelings and said you were fine but you weren't - however you continued to listen to my emotional shit and it proved to me that you're just as selfless as you think I am. You always listen to other people's problems and in all friendships became the bigger person. I know I've said this a lot over the past few weeks but I will be the bigger person for you, that's a promise.
- You're emotional: Whenever we need one, you do a heart to heart with me and it's good to see you be so open about how you feel in that time. I know you hide your feelings a lot but don't, please, it's not healthy. As I said before, if you ever ended up like me, I'd never forgive myself because I know I could prevent it. Let your emotions run free all the time like you do during our heart to hearts.
- You're genuine: You always try your best to live up to your words and you will, unless major problems occur, keep it. I know recently you haven't kept it because you've been tired and stuff, but it doesn't take away from my opinion that you are really genuine with your word.
- You listen: You listen to me whenever I have a problem. You listen when I'm acting stupid, you listen when you know I regret what I'm saying. You've listened to me so much in the past year and this is a trait of yours that is deserving of large amounts of my gratitude. You listening to me is one of the best things you can do for me because it does honestly make me feel loved.
- You're trustworthy: I can trust you with my deepest and darkest secrets. There's nobody I've been 100% truthful with and I know you keep all of them and not tell anyone. I know I can rely on you for anything I need because my trust in you is the biggest anyone I know has received.
- You're amazing: There's not much to say on this one other than the fact that you are, and always will be, amazing in my eyes and the eyes of so many other people who you're friends with.
- You're inspirational: You inspire me to do well in everything I do - just like you. If we both do the same thing, you inspire me to be on the same level as you because that's the effect you have - you inspire people to be just like you.
- You're fair: The Chenyeol model situation brought this out for me, stronger than it did before. Even when it fucks you over in some way, or it's more unfair on you in the short term, you remain fair. You've been fair to me throughout our three years of friendship you've been nothing but fair, even when I was unfair on you and the ability you have to keep that fairness is admirable.
- You're passionate: If you love something or someone, you'll fight for them no matter what. When people make fun of me on chat and when stuff you believe in is mentioned have taught me this is among a big trait of yours. Your passion for coding, being a good friend, making amazing characters and being a good person is something I've only seen on a few people and I'm glad that you, my best friend, are one of those people.
- You're focused: If you need something to be done you'll get it done, no matter how long it takes. I know sometimes I complain about this (I want it all what can I say :P) but I do honestly think it's an amazing thing you do. Sometimes I wish I had your ability to focus because then we'd get shit done quicker.
And there's 26 reasons on why I love you. Of course, there's a special 27th that deserves to be separate from the rest and, well, here it is:
Whatever imperfections you think you have Finny, know that I personally love them and I wouldn't change them or you for anything in the world. To me, you're nothing short of perfect and I hope this conveys it to you. For all of my life I wanted the best friend people say about in books, films and TV shows and I never thought I'd find it until November 14th 2012 came and I began to talk to the person who'd eventually fill this role. It's in you that I found this seemingly mythical at times best friend and I wish that my parents did make the move back in 2013 because then I'd be able to speak to you in real life and potentially see you everyday. Another promise I couldn't make on the table is that I promise one day we'll meet and I'll tell you from my own spoken words how much you mean to me. There's not a day that goes by where I don't think I'm really lucky to have Brocky292 as my best friend who loves me no matter what and who always is, and always will be, there for me. So, from the most deepest place of my heart, thank you Brock for being my best friend.